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Sent to a friend First of all I'm married, but I hate the b@$tch. This marriage was over a long time ago. I can't leave this situation because of my responsibilty with my son. The problem is not the marriage...........the problem is that I'm in love with another woman. I'm trapped between a rock and a hard place. As much as I want to be with this woman, I cannot leave my blissless marriage yet. How can I have my CAKE and EAT IT TOO.Rating:0.00
Comments
You can't have your cake and eat it too, but you can be a man and either admit that it's over and leave the misery that you claim you're in or you can stay there and grin and bear it, until your son is old enough for you to then move on.
I personally feel that you CAN'T be that miserable if you can stay there KNOWING that you aren't happy. People use their children as the reason that they remain in "bad" relationships, but I question their real reasons for staying in them.
You can love and provide for a child separately but equally and it's very commendable that you have put your son first, but you underestimate him. He knows what's going on between his mother and you and it is taking a toll on him, he just isn't saying anything about it.
~ SL ~- the reasons you list for not leaving your blissless marriage are just pure and simple bs. if you wanted to end this marriage you could have done it a long time ago. i hope that your wife wakes up and leaves your azz. i also hope the other woman gets fed up with being stood up and dumps you too. this would be poetic justice for a cake eater like yourself.
if you wanted to leave you would so just suck it up or pack it up. but whatever you do be a responsible father to your son. the child should not suffer because you are confused and have an addiction for sweets (cake!!!!!!) - YOU CAN'T HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO. BECAUSE ONCE YOU HAVE EATEN THE CAKE IT IS ALL GONE!!! WE ARE OFTEN UNSATIFIED WITH OUR MATE WHEN WE HAVE SOMEONE TO COMPARE THEM TO. YOU HAVE ANOTHER WOMAN, AND YOU KNOW THAT IT IS WRONG. THE RESSPONSILBILITY FOR YOUR SON WILL ALWAYS BE THERE. BUT IT WOULD BE INTERESTING TO HEAR YOUR WIFE'S SIDE OF THE STORY
- People stay in bad marriages for the wrong reason(s). What you don't understand is that kids are stronger than you think. Talk to them. Let them know it's not their fault mom and dad are getting a divorce. They will understand...
- I agree with many of the previous comments. You cannot have your cake and eat it too and children are more resiliant than you think. As long as you and she can maintain a civil relationship for the sake of your son and you are all that a father should be to his children, your son will not suffer as much as you think if you leave her. I know this from my own experiences. I recently divorced a controlling, possessive, manipulative, and self absorbed man (a relationship I knew I needed to leave). I won't get into all the factors that I considered before leaving, but the last thread that was holding me there was the possible impact it would have on my children until I finally realized that the situations and examples (basically experiences) they are subjected to every day have an impact as well. Therefore, I was not doing them any favors to stay locked in a marriage with someone who was trying to diminish me to the status of a puppet. If I stayed I would subject them to frequent arguments, emotional distance, and a loveless relationship that was only maintained due to obligation. I also realized that sets the stage for the relationships or marriages they will have one day. I don't want to teach my kids that they have to stay locked in misery with someone. Life is too short for that. No one can decide what to do but you, but ask yourself one question: If your son was not a part of the equation, would you leave your wife? Really think about that. If your son is really ALL that's holding you there, you already know what to do. Somtimes it is not discovering what to do that is difficult for us. It's executing on it.
- If you really loved the other woman you would leave your wife. You are a spineless liar. Regards.