Read confession
Sent to a friend OK. I need to tell someone this. I worked with a man who fell in love with me. He feel in love with me almost 7 years ago. He was married and so was I. I was not interested in him at all. But he was a nice guy who only dated his wife. I thought he was just confused. So. I still talked to him. We had to work together quite a bit and became pretty close friends. About 5 years ago. he sent me a email telling me he loved me. I was flattered..but I wrote him back saying I would never have feelings for him. The next day he looked like he was about to die. I could tell I hurt him and I felt terrible.Well...his wife read that email and thank goodness she had seen my response. Anyways...the guy would not go away. He loved me. He told if he knew he had even a 1% chance of being with me he would leave his wife. He is in a pretty bad marriage. She is pretty mean to him. I have been thinking for years that she wanted to leave him herself.
So...a long time ago...i began to have feelings for him. I tried to ignore them....I tried...but they grew stronger the more I got to know him. He was everything I had ever wanted in a man. I was in a bad marriage for 11 years.
So..he had told me I was the woman of his dreams. He gave me money and presents...and I took them so he wouldn't feel bad...even though I felt uncomfortable. I knew he was in love with me...but I didn't tell him I had feelings for him. I thought it was for the best.
Then...Feb of 2005....he offered to give me a massage...we got a room...and we had sex. I was so upset...I left crying...I was in love with him...but I didn't want to have an affair with him. He was too good of a person. We continued to have sex...all summer here and there...he treated me like a queen...I felt very guilty...and so last October...I thought about what he said. About how he would leave his wife if he had a chance with me. I had no doubt in my mind he loved me...
I trusted him more than I trusted anyone else. I knew he would never hurt me. So...last November...I came clean. I told him how I felt. I thought that's all it would take...he would leave. Well...he didn't. He has two daughters...and suddenly...when I confess my love...he remembered he had them. He said he couldn't leave his daughters. I was shocked..I mean...wasn't he thinking of his girls when told me all the things he told me? If his wife was so horrible...why wasn't he leaving with them. I couldn't believe he would lie to me or use me. I knew him too well. So for the past nine months...he has told me to wait for him.
He loves me to pieces for weeks....then suddenly feels guilty and basically ignores me. I left my husband back in March because i couldn't take his crap..and I was cheating on him. I was sick of lying. The man...has put me through hell. I am stunned. I mean...I don't trust very many people....especaially men...and I can't believe he has done what he'd done. I have asked him at least once every month if he wants to just end everything and forget leaving. He has told me no every single time. Now...this month...I thought i was going to lose him for sure. But we emailed a long time one night and everything seemed to be fixed.
He spent about three weeks calling me...emailing me a million times a day....sleeping with me. I mean...last month...he felt guilty for the sex...and i told him no more physical then...now...three weeks ago...he couldn't get enough...last week..he came to my apartment...his wife called work...and he was almost caught. He had to lie to her. So...after the night of sex and all that love stuff...the next day...he acts as though he has no feelings for me. Then on the weekend he sent me a email telling me he has to leave now or we have to stop. I have never been so pissed in my whole life. He is the one who has initiated every single physical thing. He says he feels guilty...then later changes his mind. Acts like it's me who is forcing this on him. The other night I threatened to tell his wife. I have notes and emails and gifts..I mean...I could ruin him. Then he was pissed at me because...he doubts I love him. Well...how am I supposed to believe he loves me? He is acting like it's over.
He was talking about having kids with me last week...and now...it's over. He can't leave his girls. now...here is why I am so pissed. Why didn't his kids matter to him when he was chasing after me for 6 years? Why didn't he think about them then? I feel like he used me. He lied to me and used. This is a person I trusted with my life. I had no reason to ever ever ever think he'd lie to me.
So...I wish so bad his wife knew. I am so angry...I want him to lose everything. Me...his job...his wife...his house...everything. He walks around here preaching to people. He is in bible studies. He lectured a girl about moving in with her boyfriend...while he is having sex with me. He is a phony. I want everyone to know. He hurt...and he knew the whole time he was hurting me...yet he continued to do it. I don't want to be the one to ruin him. I want him to be caught.
His wife doesn't deserve a jerk like him. This is all his fault. Oh yes...I was in it too...but only after 5 years of thinking a man was crazy about me. His whole goal was to be with me. And now...he changed his mind.
I want his wife to know. Only...I don't want to tell her.
I am pissed. I feel betrayed...he wanted me...I gave him everything he asked for...and he has turned his back on me. I almost hate him. He deserves to be caught. That's what I think.
Rating:1.00
Comments
- Betrayed, you got what you deserved
- DANG GIRL CAN YOU SPELL P-L-A-Y-E-D? NOW CAN YOU SPELL YO-YO? GIRL WHAT REASON WOULD YOU HAVE TO LET THIS MAN WIFE KNOW HOW BIG A FOOL YOU WERE. I WISH I WAS HIS WIFE AND YOU CALLED ME. I WOULD TELL YOU THAT YOU DIDN'T CALL ME WHEN YOU WERE GETTING LAID, SO DON'T CALL ME NOW THAT YOU HAVE BEEN PLAYED. BIG GIRL THAT YOU ARE MESSING WITH A MARRIED MAN, YOU KNEW THE ENDING TO THIS STORY BEFORE IT BEGAN. HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU WERE JUST A LIKE A YO-YO UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND. REMEMBER A MOODY PERSON IS JUST A MANIPULATOR. HE MANIPULATED YOU WITH HIS GUILT AND SILENT TREATMENT AND WHEN HE GOT HORNY, HE TURNED ON THE CHARM AND YOU WERE HIS FOR THE TAKING. YOU GOT JUST WHAT YOU DESERVE, AND IF YOU FRONT THE WIFE YOU MIGHT GET YOUR ASS WHOOPED.------ WHEN YOU ARE CHEATING HOW CAN EVER EXPECT TO WIN.!!!
- Damn girl i don't know what to say but,why? why would you sleep with a married man, don't you watch lifetime? we all know how those stories end.
He played you and he knew what he was doing, from the first time you noticed that he was acting funny after the first sexual encounter ,like nothing ever happen then you should've let his ass go, that was the first sign that he was a asswhole. I'm sorry that had to happen to you, but you seem like a smart woman,i would've taken the gifts, money and run. you made the mistake of letting your feelings get caught up,and since you was sleeping with him it should've just been a friends with benefit thing, not makin plans to be together and shit.But my ass would mail all those e-mails to his wife nad return address, anonymous, u betta pull a KARMA on his ass, make sure you get the last laugh out of this one girl. DAMN MEN CAN BE SO TRIFFLIN!!!! - ANOTHER SCORNED WOMAN.!!!!! NOW WHO IS REALLY TRIFFLING THE MARRIED MAN OR THE WOMAN THAT SLEEPS WITH HIM KNOWING THAT HE IS MARRIED?
- uuuuhhmm....yeah right*)
- Just let him go. He is a creation of God. Just know that you have found yr real love but it is not available. Enjoy your friends instead :) i hope u are better.
- DAMN YOU STORY WAS TOO LONG...I FELL ASLEEP...LOL
- He is only using you...
He wanted you for so long beacuse it was "exiting" then when you finally came around, he got the best of both worlds.. Dont Think he will ever leave his wife.. And as long as he gets away with having both of you, he will keep it that wAy.. Feel sorry for you, you did not deserve this.. Know its hard, but leave him, and make sure his wife finds out.. If he looses you both, thats karma for beeing such egomaniac.. Wish you the best-:) - It sounds like you've fianlly come to terms with the inevitable. Your current anger is a predictable stage you must work through. You're on the last page of that chapter in your life. You can't "unlive" it. Flip the page, take a deep breath, forgive and renew yourself. Anger is poisonous to your soul. The sun will shine again. You're going to have to work at it.