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Sent to a friend[3034] i am in love with my Sister in law
I am a 38 year old married man. I have been married for 12 years to a wonderful woman. She has never been anything but good to me and has given me three of the greatest children a man could ever have. For the last 2 years her sister and I have been having a secret affair. we have been attracted to one another for a long time but chose to not act on it.Over the years as we have been around each other and have only grown closer, we could no longer deny what we felt. She is my soulmate and there is no way I could love another woman more then I love her. It is tearing us up, the betrayel we both feel is almost too hard to bear. My wife and her sister are very close and always have been, she feels like the worst person on earth and I too feel like a rotten Judas.
This would impact our families and so many people in so many ways. We always ask ourselves when do we sacrifice our own happiness for the sake of other peoples happiness? It is such a hard question to answer. It would mean harming my children as well as hers, her sister who is my wife and her husband who is a very decent man. when we are at family gatherings and I have to watch her leave with her husband it just tears me up inside. I know I am meant to be with this woman and she feels the same way. She has been begging me to come up with a solution so that we can be with one another for good, she does not believe she can keep up this illusion for much longer.
I think the only answer is for us to break it off before we ruin the lives of the ones we are supposed to love the most.
No one on earth knows of this and there is no one I can talk. I feel alienated from everything in my life now. Just writing this out is therapeutic and I now know that the only answer to this is to break it off. Thank You. I have a heavy heart.
Rating:4.13
Comments
- Just remember the good times you have had and leave it at that because if u spill the beans, your wife and yourwifes sisters husband will probly never forgive her sister and you . Other then lustfull attraction and good sex what are you gonna realy do with her that you cant do with your wife anyways? Im a man who to wishes that life could be like an erotic movie. but its not people are a selfish jealous bunch and dont like to share.if u do get caught just tell em your just fallowing jesus final command and thats for everyone to love each other. that and be happy just being friends with her sister. You can always sleep with her sister which is your wife! If you re determind, get yourwife to sleep with her husband and make them the ones in trouble instead.good luck
- oh God. Sometimes you just have to say "not in this lifetime" &this is one of those times. I don't know if you have ever been cheated on by someone u love but it is the most excruciating pain. It is very clear what ur decision must be if u want to save the people (including ur children)u most luv from incredible pain. Stop being selfish. You made the decision to marry ur wife. Either accept that & fall in luv w her again or divorce her. Stop the affair & Accept that her sister is not an option 4 u. And take this to ur grave aftewards. Your wife deserves more respect than this, especially if she has been as great as you say. Think about someone other than yourself now. I hope you will make the right decision.
- Is it worth it, all the hell that you are putting yourself through. But I am a firm believer that you pay for your secrets eventually. The mouth will eventually tell what the heart feels. It is best that you end this for it will surely end itself in time. Your sister -n-law is about to bust the bubble, it is only a matter of time. The hell that you both feel should be felt, because you both know that you are dead wrong. You and your sister in law are going to get old and when your children and her children have nothing to do with either one of you, the both of you will have what you all wanted each other but that is all that you will have. May GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL, FOR YOU HAVE TRULY STEPPED THROUGH THE THRESHOLD OF HELL WITH THIS SINFUL RELATIONSHIP.
- That is horrible. But I can relate. You should have divorced your wife before screwing her sister.
What a mess. Hmmm. - I am the man who posted this, although I do not know if I have the right to call myself a man anymore. You are all right in what you say. We have both acted foolishly and selfishly, I broke off the relationship soon after posting this confession. I feel like I have lost my right arm. I am brokenhearted over the loss of my wifes sister, but even more I am sick over what I have done to my family even thought they do not have an idea of what happened. My wife knows that something is wrong with me, I have never been one to verbalize my problems but she KNOWS all is not right with me and I can see it hurts her when I do not respond to her offers of help. I do not deserve this wonderful woman and I do not know if I will ever forgive myself for hurting her or her sister. The sad thing is that if her sister calls I will be unable to resist. I don't go to the family gatherings anymore becase I do not trust the two of together, especially after our recent split. I think we both need time and space. I cannot hide from the family forever, I will have to be a man and suck it up. I always thought I was a rock and now I know I am a coward.
- I think you should keep on having your secret affair to the very end. Best thing in an affair is that it is secret, the guilt u feel and especially when it is incest relationship.
Keep fucking her as much as u can
- Dude...
I feel your pain and you are a man but one who has made a mistake. I also am having feelings for my sister-in-law. She is so wonderful and special my kids even love her. I have a daughter from a previous marriage and her and my soon to be ex-wife hate each other but she loves my sister-in law.
We talk and talk like we are best friends and have been texting each other late at night recently. She has supported me thru the impending divorce with her sister and is the only one who talks to me from her family.
My situation is different because my wife was the one who was having the affairs with her ex-boyfriends. I tried to make it work and fight for my family but got tired of battling with her. I had to call my sister-in-law and ask her if she knew about it I just wanted to know if she knew. She was shocked and really concerned about me it was truly nice. We have been talking ever since and I told her that many times I wish it was her I had married. She agreed that we always got along well together. I am now thinking of her a lot, especially when I close my eyes late at night. I want to be with her more and more I think she would want to do the same, but she is a decent person so it probably will not happen for us.
So, I know it is tuff on you and her but first if you two really want to be together you both need to end your marriages. You may choose to tell why maybe not, probably best not to go into it if there are kids involved. Just end your marriages and continue to see each other quitely until some time passes. Love is funny and since she is your wifes sister they share some qualities that atrracted you to your wife, you need to talk to her and ask what she truly wants then take it from there....GL!
- well here a take from a different perspective,I am the adult child of a man who was never fathiful to his wife and was bad at hiding it. I watch my mom cry and suffer endlessly. I hated my dad for what he did to my mom and us. I felt that he did not love her and we were included in that idea. I grew up angry at him and when I was old enough to tell him to go to hell, I did. I felt like I did not need to respect him nor listen to him and when he tried to parent me I'd tell him "GO TO HELL". He tried to lie to us and tell us that it was not true that he was cheating But, I caught him red handed. The resentment and anger has carried through out my life. In 1982 he suffered a serious accident that almost killed him,everyone went to his side includ-
ing my mom. I felt almost at peace that this man was going to die and I was ok with that fact. He made it though and he change his ways.I still carried a lot of resentment and anger,I could not forgive him for his behavior towards us and my mom. What funny is my dad was a great provider and a loving man but, get in between his secret life and he got verbally mean and nasty to all of us. my dad is 86 years old and has been bedridden for sometime it was not until last OCT2008 that he was relly sick and I thought he was going to die again that it actually hurt.I had to put all my negative feeling for him behind us anf I finally forgive him. The greatest gift you can give your kids is to love and respect thier mother. If you feel that she is not your soulmate then do it the right way and be honest with her and leave.
DON"T date anyone until some kind of healing has taken place. Is this love,lust, soulmate stuff worth the love and respect of YOUR KIDS?my dad end up staying with my mom and adores her.it may not be your decision to saty but, you have to put an end to your cheating.
- You need therapy. Seeking the help of a doctor will help you with your grief over the several losses you are feeling- your self-worth, having betrayed your wife and family, and the loss of a love. You need to prepare for the possibility that all this will come out. You sister-in-law is more likely to tell her husband about the affair than you are to tell your wife. Confessing to her husband about her affair with you, while it will hurt him, is not betraying him through an affair with one of his siblings- which is far, far worse. Good luck, you have a long road ahead of you.
- I have been having an affair for the last year with my sister in law. we both feel that we are in love and do not know what to do. she is leaving my brother next month. since i started this affair my life has become a wreck, i cant concentrate on anything else but her and the affair. she was wanting to divorce him before we started this because he had cheated on her , but i know that is no excuse for what i have done. we have tried and tried to cut it off but we love to talk to each other and be around each other. we keep trying to figure out how to make it work. people say that you are sorry for doing this, but you can not help the way you feel about another person. I just wanted to say that you are not alone. i have been going to therapy because of this and my therapist tells me that i should tell him because this is like a boil waiting to burst.
- I have traveled that road and i know waht you are talking about. However I came up with a solution that is helping me keep my eyes of my sister-in-law at least for a couple of days: Whenever I make love to my wife, I am imaginaing that she is her sister, the one I am in love with. The desire for my sister in law fades away at least for several days, and when it comes back, my wife is there for me in her stead.
- You should have never done this in the first place. Marriage and family is sacred. Maybe it would have been easier to swallow if you were cheating in general, but with her own sister? How could you?
This is so wrong in many ways. You said that your wife has been wonderful and would never do anything to hurt you. Why would you ruin something so precious? I can't imagine what hell your family is going to go through if or when this gets out. Not only is it going to ruin your family's life, but it's going to ruin her relationship with her sister forever.
You know what you need to do and you need to take care of it sooner rather than later. - My Dear, its alright to be in love with someone then to be not in love with anyone. Tell your wife about your feelings towards her sister, i m sure whe will certainly appreciate it. Also take your sister inlaw's husband in confidence also. In today's society people are becoming more experimenting. Try to be as truthful as u can and try to involve your sis in law and her husband in a foursome, i.e. u and your wife and your sis in law and her husband. BUT MY ADVICE IS dont do it in a haste. Give the circumstances some time to develop on its own. Fruits ripen with time are always sweet. In fact recent analysis by some psychologists say there is not harm in finding love outside marriage if both the parties agree to it, and in the long run it can really spice up the life of all the partners who are party to it.
Dewa - I never been good at giving advice but here it goes.Being in love and thinking your in love is 2 different things but when it comes it catches you by surprise.Only you and her can determine which it is or could it be lust? hmmm. I believe there are few options to that, keep having the secret love affair and or don't make it a secret anymore or just end it.If you stay with your wife and your miserable and constant arguing or just incompatible why live that way? Wouldn't that be hurting your family as well?
If you feel you have found your call in life being whatever it is why miss the opportunity, a happy person may be better for him or her and others.Now this isn't about being selfish because we tend to do things that our selfish.Keep in mind your kids wait until they are a little older if she loves you she'll wait .They need parents but happy ones...Only your heart and mind can answer your own questions.Good luck with your decision. - I dream of fucking my sister in law BUT without divorcing my wife. I just want to screw her to death....
- my sister in law is way hot all you have to do is fantisize about it. once you sleep with her you've crossed a line
- I do love kelly With all my heart she is my wife I do love her I feel happy when I never not with out you in my mind but I do love her I will keep her in my arms I never thinking about her in my life Iam 22 yrs god please help me she is my wife before I love her confessed before I die
- love, is as damning as it is blessing..just depends which side ur on..kinda like freedom fighter or rebel..
I love my wife(say 'Betty'), been wid her for 4 years been married for 1. 'Betty' got married forcefuly by her parents (2 years ago) to this guy in her family..but later she fel in love wid him, only to find out he was cheating on her wid another girl, they got divorced..during the time of her marriage i was in random touch wid her sister(named 'cathy') and grew a bond..and as time passed by it grew more than tht, but i never realized it was love...when Betty got divorced i consoled her and tried to be there for her cuz i stil had feelings for her..eventually we (Betty and me) got married by our families consent. It was good at first but her first marriage scarred her so deep tht she is not the same person hu i loved initially..n we started to hv a lot of arguments, but since she and her sister (cathy) are closer than best friends, she used to tel her everythng and since cathy and i are very much alike she used get my point of view and talk to me abt it. I, by tht time realized tht the closeness and comfort i felt wid her was love..and i tried to distance my self from cathy cuz now she was my sister-in-law, but it didnt help and got to a point where i cudnt hold back so i told the both of them separately, my wife (betty)also knows tht i have told her sister(cathy) abt it, but her sister doesnt knw tht betty knows... Now the predicament is i love them both.. I dont wanna hurt my wife to b wid her sister, and i knw cathy loves her sister enuff to not evn accept she loves me evn though it is quite evident at times but we both laugh it off knowingly...but at times it gets really hard being around knwing i cannot be wid her..oh n by the way my wife is much hotter than her sister..but i think love by looks n physic is more like lust, n love cuz of personality match..is soulmate stuff....so yeah which ever way i tel it its stil just as fucked up! Maybe some day it wil get over...mayb tht day wil b my end too ;)
- Divorce your wife and be with who you love. The pain will heal over time but life is to short for you not to be happy.
- what you done in out of plce give your slf a smack over the head
- I'm in my late 40's and my wife late 30's. My sister-in-law , who is in her early 40's, and I had a brief affair. She and her husband lost their business and we had to take them in for a few months. They couldn't pay us rent. One Saturday morning her and I were home together alone. We were chatting and she asked how often my wife and I "did it". I jokingly said not enough. She responded, you know we can't afford to pay you anything for living here, so how about I give you a blowjob once in a while. My eyes nearly popped out of my head. How about one now, she offered. We were standing in the kitchen, she dropped to her knees and pulled down my track pants and underwear. I admit, I was nervous, but still managed to cum in her mouth after a few minutes. This continued on for the entire time they lived with us. A average of 3-4 times a week. I even went down on her occasionally, but we never had intercourse. That was 4 years ago, and to this day, when we get a free moment together, we still "please" each other. Our spouses have never found out and we do not intend to tell. I still have the usual sex life with my wife and she does with her husband. We are both happily married families with kids. We have never talked about stopping the "oral" affair as we both like sex so much. We both feel it's worth it as long as we are careful.
- Feeling for you man. There comes a time in your life when you have to think of your own hapiness. Make absolutely sure it is what you both want then walk away from your marriage. Sounds blunt but that's how it has to be. Just go for it and make yourself happy for once.
- I am the man who posted this and my sister in law and I are back at it. I appreciate all of the advice that everyone here has posted. We tried to stay away from one another but in the end we just could not do it. She is my soulmate and I will never give her up. We are both going to stay with our spouses, but in the end, if we have to be found out in order to stay together that is the way it is going to be. She has taken a job that allows her to travel about once a month and I join her on these business trips, eventually someone is going to connect the timeline of travel, connect the dots and the gig will be up, we have already prepared ourselves for this possibility. We were miserable without one another and we will never go through that again. This is not just about sex, it is about the way we feel together, we are so close we don't even need to talk half the time, and when we are out of town together and do not have to hide, and we go out as a couple.... it is the best feeling n the world. When we return and have to go to our respective homes, it is very hard for us. She is wonderful, my heart swells every time I think of her, I cannot imagine a life that does not involve her. I can barely fuck my wife anymore, I always have to give excuses to her why i am not interested and I can see that she is hurt, in my heart of hearts, I hope that this will drive her into the arms of another man, because she is very sexual and wants it all of the time. If that were to happen I could leave her guilt free and be with the one I truly love. Thank all of you for your comments.
- I am at it with my sister in law Sandra D we cant get enough of it we do it 4 times a week or more I want us both to leave our partners and Sandra live with me as I want to have babies with her. I think she is already pregnant by me.
- I would encourage any Christian husband who can take-his sister-in-law into his arms and pray with-her, to hug her, and always undress-her in his vision.. and to make-her enjoy his semen as much as his wife, in at least four differant ways if possible. If mensruating, she should enjoy him orally.. I would prefer that he impregnate His sister-in-law, and his-wife-in the same room, the same weekend. I think they will both-enjoy it even more.
this would be a Blessing From God - When you get married it is for better or for worse my friend. Do not think for a min that becuase you have feelings for another woman, that it means you have lost the lvoe for your wife and she is not your soul mate. What your doing is an act of selfishness and pure lust in my view
- i am also in love with my sister in law, she loves me too , but my problem is she is in another country now for job opportunity,we been apart now for almost 2 months now,what shall i do?eventhough i'm with my wife now, i miss her very much, sometimes i wish i could visit her in the country she is working because she has a 2 yrs contract there, i do love her very much please help me some advice please..
- The original poster and all the atta boys that followed. You should all hid your selfish heads in shame. It is without out question disgusting Never mind your family members finding out look in the mirror you may not be the only family member she's doing . I had my man gop to my sister he was the fourth of my men she wanted. Bet you feel special now and hopefully you are really thinking about who else is involved in this mess
- To the guy who posted this:
Man,
I really understand you. I am going through similar hell.
Only I don't have children yet, and my sister in law lives with her mother. My sister in law is the most beautiful thing in the world - soul and body. I am crying every time I think of her. We didn't have an affaire and I am not sure I am going to have one soon, but it hurts so badly. I am 29 and the SIL is 20, I have been in love with her since she is 15.....
This is a living hell and I don't blame you for getting back together with your wife's sister.
Maybe it is better to tell your wife / her husband so it can be official...??
Cheers - Bravo! I think half of us with an IQ above the level of retardation have had thoughts about a good looking SIL at one point in our lives, but smart enough not to act upon them.
You tapped her funbox because you could, And you still want more? You're pretty much screwed. If you dump her, she'll freak out and tell your wife for you. If you marry her, you'll never trust each other. If you trust her knowing she is lying to her sister and having an affair with a maried man --I can offer you some beachfront property in Florida.
Worse part is that in the end, women always stick together no matter what. By being with her, everyone loses --especially you. Imagine the family reunions during the holidays.
Let's face it. You don't love each other. Love is something you choose to do and not a feeling or an emotion. It's doing and wishing the best for the other person regardless of what you think or feel. There are no varying degrees of love. You either do something or you don't.
Thoughts, ideas, feelings and emotions are like birds: We can't keep them from flying above our heads, but we don't have to let them make nests in our hair.
It's easy and even preferable to decide to love someone you lust for or are attracted to. It's certainly difficult to choose to love someone you don't particularly like. I myself enjoy the new girlfriend smell. But like everything else, the scent of your SIL will get old. Then what?
You can't control feelings or emotions, but you certainly can choose on how you decide to think, communicate or behave. The laundry list tells me that you're probably going through a guilt trip ever since you decided not to love your wife anymore. Your SIL certainly does not love her sister.
It's too easy to list a million reasons to say you love a woman you're attracted to, but you only need one reason to do the right thing.
How can you promise to love each other forever if it were something that was not totally up to you?
Now you have to pull yourself together, stop making up excuses, be a man and find a way to let it all go. Your SIL will get eventually get tired or even bored of having to sneak away to do the Dr. Nasty. She'll up the ante by spilling the beans with her "guilty" conscience. You'll be the "Bad Guy" and they'll always be sisters.
- Guy with the SIL overseas: Get a passport or get over it.
- telling it to the person who originally posted it. i know what you are going throug and it is hell but can you really continue? your sil will become really jelous about your wife everytime you stay away from her, and she will start accusing you soon, that you are givng more time to your wife than her.
- I'd like to thank you soo much, i too dhave the hots for my SIL and have kids and all that. Almost same sistuation. Reading all this makes me see the big picture soo much better.
I have wanted her ever since i can remember. We have alot in common, good conversation, attration, and she smells so damb good!!! BUT still even with all of these thing, they dont equal out the negitive things in prusueeing something with her.
So for that i give you a great big THANK YOU on opening my eyes from the lust blinders.
AS for you ? i dont know what to tell you. Your going to have to wish for death on somebody or something.
maybe take up a hobbie or hobbies to keep your mind off your love triangle. LIKE? going to the gym, gun club, hunting , pool leauge, swimming, hiking, video games, porn, these are just a few GL to you and god bless - THINK OF YOUR CHILDREN BEFORE YOU THINK OF YOUR SISTER-IN-LAW OR YOUR WIFE EVEN. YOU MARRY A GIRL, BECOME FATHER OF THREE CHILDREN AND THEN REALISE YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH YOUR SISTER-IN-LAW ?? OF COURSE IT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYBODY BUT WHAT ABOUT CHILDREN !!
WHY SHOULD THEY SUFFER AT ALL ???
WE AS A MAN OR WOMAN MAY THINK WE ARE INDEPENDENT TO THINK AND ACT IN OUR OWN WAY ?? WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO US IF
OUR PARENTS OR ANY OF THEM WOULD HAVE CHOSEN TO DECIDE TO END MARRIAGE JUST BECAUSE THEY FELT SAME WAY FOR ANY OF OUR AUNTS. - This is all twisted
- A STRONG MAN IS STRONG FOR HIM SELF AND HIS PEOPLE AND A WEAK MAN IS WEAK FOR HIM SELF AND HIS PEOPLE.IN THIS LIFE THRE IS THREE KIND OF MEN:LOSERS;WINNERS AND HERROS.CHOOSE YOUR PLACE
- man i feel your pain. I am married for 2 yrs and love ma wife but cant
get ma sil out of ma head.. Am 30 and shes 25 and i think i love her.
I txt her morning and night and she txt me bak. I know she likes me too but am scared of doing anything encase i am wrong. She always kisses me and every time she in the room we both find it difficult to look @ each other.
We have hooked up a few times and no1 knows about it, but we never done anything. We even had a spliff togther but am scared to do anything encase i loose her or my wife finds out.
She has a BF but heard shes fukedhim about but she is so hot and i get on with her better than ma wife. A am so confused dont know wot to do help
- I would keep screwing her as much as you and her want to. Screw the others. You would naturally stop screwing her if sex with your wife was hotter anyways. Do what cums naturally. Congratulations! It's way easier when youre closer to her and have more chances of getting together, even in the same house when everyone is there! so exciting! woohoo!
- Do not go down this road . I am in love with my sil . And we flirt alot . But I know if we take it to the next step I will be hurting my whole family. There is much more to my story . But it is too painful to even write about. Your common bond is the fact that she is your sil . Just keep it a secret fantasy and you will be a better man for it. If you persue it you are o ly thinking of your selfish needs not what it will do to your family . What is more impotant in this life than family.
- Dude, I am sorry, but you are being a coward, and you are humiliating your wife. You have choices, and you are waiting to end this situation in the worst possible way. You are betraying your wife -- a wonderful woman who has never been anything but good to you -- , your children -- the greatest children a man could ever have -- Can't you see how blessed you are? Why don't you end your marriage with a little bit of dignity? You owe this to your family. Your SIL owes this to her family and her sister. My SIL is something else, but definitely not my soulmate. I restrain myself from fantasizing myself being in a romantic situation with her or any other woman. This is respect, but if I were caught in a situation like yours, I would at least be honest to myself, to my wife and children, and to everything else I believe in life. You both are feeling miserable, and misery loves company. Doesn't it? You should care more about the important people in your life. This is a good advise dude. You would damage your children' life if you do not do the right thing now. You will ruin their confidence. They might not be able to build healthy relationships in the future. If you have a daughter, she will be fat and frustrated. Your family will be disgusted with you. Your children will never respect you. Think in the consequences of your choices. Be responsible. Go talk with a psychologist. Since there is no way to stay with your wife, you can be happy with your SIL without damaging everybody else's life. Think about it.
- I think u better stop it from now
- I understand. I have been in love with my S-I-L for 14 years! We've never "been together", but we are close and I love her with all my heart. She is the love of my life.
Just be careful because you will only have a mess if you play this wrong. You've already made the mistake, but letting it out will only hurt many people.
- You are both being very selfish! My family found out two years ago that my dad and my mum's sister had an affair for 6 years without my mum or anyone knowing. It has nearly torn our family apart and my mum now has recently been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, brought on by the stress of this affair. I will never speak to my aunt again and will never look at my father the same way. You are playing with so many people's lives. Stop the affair now and keep this nasty secret to yourselves before you hurt the poeple you should be caring about the most!!